scull the water to sail above the wave

Reverberations Memory reverberates best in empty spaces Spaces made empty by the simplest act Whitewashing balanced colors of emotion Paintbrushes of pain, caked and fresh Streak the white with jagged strokes Blend into indecipherable colors  Reverberations travel through mind, body & soul Hand to paintbrush, paintbrush to canvas Fast and furious fades out Painful pauses fill in  Paintbrush to hand Hand to mind Reverberations of pain Travel back and forth Space begins to fill Reverberations pack themselves Into soundproof boxes Till the next unlocking Of everlasting reverberations

Elixers of Self Anxiety  Belief  Consistency  Depression Energy Freedom  Grit Happiness Illusions Justice Kryptonite Lapse Motivate Negate Optimist Queer Revive Spark Truth Unbreakable Valiant Win Xhale Yield Zealous

You Can't See Me You can't see my identity 'Cause you can't see past your own You can't see my pain  'Cause you believe in imaginary healing You can't see me crumble under secrets 'Cause your backs already broken by yours You can't see my desires and needs  'Cause they conflict with your misunderstanding You can't see the importance of acceptance 'Cause you've never accepted yourself You cant let go of changing me 'Cause you're still trying to change yourself You can't see the hurt you caused  'Cause you're too busy blocking out pain You can't see you turned the home into a house 'Cause you're still stuck in your dream mansion You can't see me Because you've chosen not to I can see myself  Because I have chosen to ps: thank you, John Cena, for the idea for this poem, although I'm not sure thats where you wanted your mantra to go.

The Ghost of You The ghost of you leaves invisible marks On my hips, wrists, throat, and apex of womanhood The ghost of you has permanent residency In the dusty recesses of my mind, body, and soul  The ghost of you walks into doctors offices Lay waiting for your turn on the bed The ghost of you crawls on my skin Religious "blessings" and medical jargon blankets The idea that the ghost of you can't be real, rather is natural, synthetic and according to society an illusion The ghost of you is peoples answer to my queerness Blaming you for my gender identity and sexual preferences The ghost of you dances illusively out of grasp Leaving me dancing one step behind to catching you The ghost of you choked me into twenty years of silence The ghost of you I am starting to fight Fight until the ghost of you no longer haunts me

Last words… Last words have an ability to undo misconceptions Last words can make your death slower or faster Last words heal the dying more than the living Last words can sever or create intergenerational bonds Last words can give you answers or create more questions Last words can be too long when you wish eternal silence Last words can be too short if you’ve never listened before Last words power lay with whoever gives them power Last words evaporate with the soul of the speaker Last words are just words, the power given by time Last words are death entrance speech

Deaths Evolution Hand holding Fighting start Peters out Health balance Random battles Influx of illusions Community wax and wane Weapons earned Lives altered Future ghosts Battle history’s skeletons Ripping present to pieces Illusions of stronghold Smokescreens shield Happiness roots Hope buds Family fences Time heals Scars burn Tik-Tok Tik-Tok Illusions shattered War cries Father time arrives Collecting unpaid dues History and future merge The final war won Death, Universal champion

Salted Treble Notes Crushed sonata Strings caught Melody paused Frozen diamonds Held back Crusted in beauty Crushed sounds Light speaks Layers of misconception Iced in shine Tools suspended Individual secrets Complete others Mouths muted Notes to be seen Outlined boundaries Bridged between time  The visual art is created by the incredible Sigalit Etel Landau

Systematic outsider Built of 'mistakes' Broken to fix Acceptance unheard Compare death with life Crippled souls Caged in misconception Escape obsolete Uneducated minds Weave lies into bible Choking expression Fear shrouded existence Man misunderstood Mistakes unpaid Debt collector creator Idly watches debts rise Clocked cages time man Existence and worth Shrouded in secrecy Unchangeable 'mistakes' Debts will be paid Inside and out

The rush of creativity Bound and locked By self loathing and doubt A fight dance before every word Blurry blue battle lines Scratching,clawing Thoughts fight-gravity never doubts Ink stains, battle scars Bones of air grasp at strings Vibrations spark falls of creativity Dams erect as streams flow Mazes of acceptance Racing against borrowed time Rivulets of creativity Scurry through broken channels Search for the grey embrace Calm dries along the route Pockets of ink batedly wait Till the next rush