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Meditations of Metal

Meditations of Metal 
Snatched out of nature by man  Burned and molded by man  Beautified and sanctified by man  Sharpened to slice by man  Choice of death by man  Shards of ossein splinter the ground by man  Ruby droplets of man Bleed and meld into grounds map of murder by man  Shroud my silver in souls of man  Ghostly notches of power on mans belt Sent back to nature by man  Bloody rust should build memories for man  Dunked in rivers of forget by man  Reasons rivulet through dents of destruction   Blamed by man for death of man  Responsibility reverberates back into nature by man Cloaked in reasonings of man  Guilt left to rot in skeletons by man  Souls screech in forests yet untouched by man  Bouncing off the hollow of mans soul and sword Tool of the trade taught to child of man Matching metal into medals of man

Waves of Grief

Waves of Grief
Waves slow dragging grains of memories
Thick storm clouds of death 
Inflate new waves with past pain
Crashing waves crush feelings of acceptance
Stirring up glass shards of unprocessed grief
Drowning souls on slippery rocks
Grasping and gripping at sharp edges of reality
Fog swirls blocking perception 
Azure droplets singe the skin 
Flashbacks choke intertwined with future fog
Suffocating dreams at their source 
Grey curtains flutter
Grains settle into new residences
Lasers of light paint messages 
Fleeting- on the waves of grief 
Settling until the next storm 






Reverberations

Reverberations Memory reverberates best in empty spaces Spaces made empty by the simplest act Whitewashing balanced colors of emotion Paintbrushes of pain, caked and fresh Streak the white with jagged strokes Blend into indecipherable colors  Reverberations travel through mind, body & soul Hand to paintbrush, paintbrush to canvas Fast and furious fades out Painful pauses fill in  Paintbrush to hand Hand to mind Reverberations of pain Travel back and forth Space begins to fill Reverberations pack themselves Into soundproof boxes Till the next unlocking Of everlasting reverberations




Elixers of Self

Elixers of Self Anxiety  Belief  Consistency  Depression Energy Freedom  Grit Happiness Illusions Justice Kryptonite Lapse Motivate Negate Optimist Queer Revive Spark Truth Unbreakable Valiant Win Xhale Yield Zealous

"You Can't See Me"

You Can't See Me
You can't see my identity 'Cause you can't see past your own You can't see my pain  'Cause you believe in imaginary healing You can't see me crumble under secrets 'Cause your backs already broken by yours You can't see my desires and needs  'Cause they conflict with your misunderstanding You can't see the importance of acceptance 'Cause you've never accepted yourself You cant let go of changing me 'Cause you're still trying to change yourself You can't see the hurt you caused  'Cause you're too busy blocking out pain You can't see you turned the home into a house 'Cause you're still stuck in your dream mansion You can't see me Because you've chosen not to I can see myself  Because I have chosen to


ps: thank you, John Cena, for the idea for this poem, although I'm not sure thats where you wanted your mantra to go.

The Ghost of You

The Ghost of You
The ghost of you leaves invisible marks On my hips, wrists, throat, and apex of womanhood The ghost of you has permanent residency
In the dusty recesses of my mind, body, and soul
 The ghost of you walks into doctors offices
Lay waiting for your turn on the bed
The ghost of you crawls on my skin
Religious "blessings" and medical jargon blankets
The idea that the ghost of you can't be real,
rather is natural, synthetic and according to society an illusion
The ghost of you is peoples answer to my queerness
Blaming you for my gender identity and sexual preferences
The ghost of you dances illusively out of grasp
Leaving me dancing one step behind to catching you
The ghost of you choked me into twenty years of silence
The ghost of you I am starting to fight
Fight until the ghost of you no longer haunts me



Last Words

Last words…
Last words have an ability to undo misconceptions Last words can make your death slower or faster Last words heal the dying more than the living Last words can sever or create intergenerational bonds Last words can give you answers or create more questions Last words can be too long when you wish eternal silence Last words can be too short if you’ve never listened before Last words power lay with whoever gives them power Last words evaporate with the soul of the speaker Last words are just words, the power given by time
Last words are death entrance speech